oooo looks like it is time to upgrade your phone, douglass. for all the confidence you need. td ameritrade. you got this. previously on "red eye." >> welcome to "red eye." >> do you think this is real? it means it is real. >> one night let the inner ke$ha fly out. >> this is why the generation is doomed. >> i get paid to lie for a living. >> now the thrilling conclusion. >> it seems like yesterday. welcome to "red eye." i'm tom shillue everyone. if you rearrange the letters of my name you get me you ill host. that's a great idea. let's anagram our guests. i am here with the "imus in the morning" -- it is dagan

mcdowell. and joanne nosuchunsky. of course there is only one anagram for this lady, andy levey. and next to me i and touchy man, anthony. >> it could be dirtier. >> a block. the lede. that's the first story. >> sweaty palms and improper attire and yawning. you might be a terrorist. a tsa checklist of suspicious behavior has been leaked on-line. the checklist obtained by the intercept website is part of the tsa's program to nab potential bad guys based on signs that indicate stress or defection. trebling, excessive throat clearing, arriving late wide open staring eyes and being in

disguise. come on don't we all wear a mustache to the airport? the aclu sued the tsa saying the program known as "spot" leads to racial profiling. dagan, sweaty palms trebling arriving late, doesn't that describe everyone at the airport? >> it is a checklist for every bad day. it goes along with every day -- date i have been on if you throw this a long john silver and a cold sore. >> you were taken to long john silver? >> i was taken to long john silver to the guy i lost my virginity to with coupon. >> you love a thrifty guy. >> the coupons were for the restaurant, right? i just want to make that clear. >> anthony is this program so

bad? we joke and we laugh, but don't we remember 9/11? >> we want to be safe. please save us and make us safe. i don't like hearing about these things. it makes me do them. if i walk into a store and i'm like oh no this doesn't have what i need and go to walk out quickly, i do it real slow. now that i know this i will be sweating, big, wide eyes. >> when i leave a store i try to keep my hands out of my pocket. what am i doing? >> joanne there is no science backing it up. it is excops or who ever cops up with these things? >> is this a waste of a billion dollars? >> it is a waste of money. they spent $900 million. >> it is very close to that, right?

>> i will never have that kind of money. a former manager of these behavior detection officers as they are called has said that this program is flawed. the only reason they have this and use this is to justify pulling people aside when it was not justifiable. these are all behaviors people do at the airport. when i am hung over i do all of those things. this is flawed. her suggestion for a better solution to this is that she said taxpayer dollars -- or he, sorry. taxpayer dollars would be better spent funding real police at tsa checkpoint. why don't we do that? >> we used to call them sucka cops. isn't that? >> how cool if there were real cops there. when i go through security i actually go through the machine and then turn around and spread em and ask them to

pat me down. and then i bark softly and it scares the bejezus out of them. if it was a real cop it would fulfill a fantasy. >> everyone wants to avoid the machine. i love that machine. >> i have never avoided it either. they constantly run me through that. >> i don't think you can avoid it. >> everyone said i don't want to go in there. that's invasive. i think the machines are quite pleasant. >> you can tell them you are pregnant and they won't put you through that. >> it was leaked on-line. you probably want to find out who is so you can make out with him of the. >> there is a point. it is easy to take one of these or several of these to say i don't do that. the way it is supposed to work

is they assign a point value to each thing on the list. if you have enough to hit a certain point value they figure you warrant a closer look. the question is not does looking like you just shaved -- does looking like you just shaved mean you are a terrorist? does that in conjunction with a bunch of other factors mean there is reason to be suspicious. that's the problem. it is not like oh i have sweaty palms too and i am not a terrorist. that's ridiculous. the question is do you have 50 of these things? >> obviously the answer is going to knob 999 times -- is going to be no 999 times. should i say 9000 or whatever? almost no one is a terrorist but if we have to pull anthony aside because he is shifty- eyed and he looks nervous and we get mohamed atta, is it worth it? >> just get anthony. >> he is a far bigger danger.

>> everyone is against what? >> it it doesn't work. >> i am not against it. one of the things is wearing a tire that isn't appropriate for the location. i want them to start harassing the [bleep] out of every man wearing flip-flops. they get on the plane and where do their hair itos go? -- hairy toes go? on the armrest. >> it is bad, but taking off -- at least when you take off a flip-flop your foot is not that funky but those who take off the boots next to me and push them aside and they have the big, stupid socks -- >> you used to wear suits on the aircraft. >> it is like going to the opera. >> i wish we could go back to those days. >> top hat and tails is the only way to fly. he paid for his tirade in

cash. the man who be rated a chick-fil-a drive-thru attendant in 2012, can you believe it was that long ago? he is now on food stamps after the stunt ruined h us career. he protested the chicken chain's anti-gay stance. >> chick-fil-a is a hateful corporation. i don't know how you live with yourself and work here. ii don't understand it. this is a horrible corporation with horrible values. >> i feel like we did this story six months ago. i can't believe it was so long ago. smith who was making $200,000 a year was fired after the video went viral. >> i had a phone call from my ceo. he wanted me to resign. i don't regret the stand i took, but i regret the way i talked to her. >> that's not our music. that's his. that's one of his favorite songs. later that year smith landed

another cfo job but he was fired when they found out about the video. i once made a video i regret. take a look. >> don't go to the airport dressed like that. they will search you. >> what do you think? this guy is a jerk. he wrote a memoir. anthony, do you feel bad for him? >> believe it or not, somebody losing their job for something they did that was dumb on the internet, i don't have any sympathy. he is questioning the girl and grilling her like it is nuremberg. she is just trying to serve you something. he came off like a jackass. screw him. and on a whim he really has so much passion for

this subject and the horrid things that chick-fil-a was doing that he decided to drive up to the window and harass an employee about it? no. good. lose your job. go on food stamps. go to the basement and be a ceo. >> there was a movement to go and order water. he ordered water and then his life went down the drain. should an act of stupidity ruin someone's life? >> absolutely it should. one he was a jerk. but he clearly went -- he is a show boat and he was going to put it on the internet. he wants to be on youtube and he wanted to be like the justin bieber of the spoken word. he thought he was going to get famous and he was gonna get to go on the eighth hour of "the today show" and he was gonna get some gig on television.

it backfired. he got what he deserved. >> look at that sweet girl. do you think he should have bailed -- when he got up to the window and he saw like the cutest girl, the nicest -- she obviously looks angelic and he should have bailed right there. >> he won't. there are people who won't. as somebody who has worked in the service industry i have had to deal with awful, awful people. the fact that she was able to keep her composure and her cool she is america's hero. i adore this girl for saying "i have to take a neutral stand. have a nice day" without the sarcasm that i would have put with it. nobody is talking about it. he is a cfo and went bankrupt in a year. he did not have a very good financial plan for him and his family. maybe the reason he was fired from his second job is he is not good at his job. i don't know. >> i think you are on to something. it was a medical devices manufacturer.

what do those people care if you are a takeout jerk? i don't think it would impede his job. i think he lost his job because he is a general tool and they were like finally a reason to fire this guy. we are so sick of him anyway. andy he wrote a memoir about his experience called "a million dollar cup of water." how cool is this guy? >> who would want to read this guy's book? >> he was probably just yelling at the reader. >> turn the page now! >> he brought this on himself. he acted like a d-bag and he filmed himself acting like a d-bag and he proudly made it public. i get why the company he was with fired him. i do feel bad for him. he made a video and is forced to sell his house and living in an rv. not that there is anything wrong with him. nobody will ever hire him. michael vick tortured dogs and

he was able to be successful dwen. >> he went to prison. >> right he served his time. this guy, it has been three years -- maybe he can broadcast out of his house. >> or pull an imus and say "i'm sorry i did that. i shouldn't have done that." >> michael vick learned. he knew he did something wrong. he didn't write a book. i had a dog and i was put in prison. he thinks he was malign because he bought a cup of water. >> he said he knows he was a jerk now. >> maybe not title it a million dollar cup of water, but a million dollar stunt? >> but a million dollar cup of water is a more catchy title. >> everyone thinks the kardashians are multimillionaires and thesex tape boom. they don't have

to go quite as far as she did. >> it is context too. high was the ceo of a company and it is not like he was a shock jock or something. if you are just pulling stunts and are a goofy guy with a dopey job i think a company would be like we don't need this guy representing us. we are also taken in by this. if it were a guy -- if it was an ugly teen guy and he was yelling at him, then the video would not have caused the stir. we just felt so bad for that girl. she handles it so well. >> i have been courteous to the customer and not even been like that. >> where does she work? >> i just believe we have a nation of second chances. >> we are. the thing is this guy hasn't learned. i regret the way i did it and not my wonderful protest. climate change will turn women into prostitutes.

i have been saying that for years. this week democrats barbara lee claimed that rising temperatures will force women to turn tricks in order to provide for their family. i am i am not making this up. a california congresswoman proposed a resolution in the house asserting the global warming will create conflict and instability and as a result, food insecure women may be vulnerable to situations such as sex work transactional sex and early marriage. she urged congress to pass laws using gender sensitive framework due to the desperate impact of climate change on women. >> did you know climate change affects women worse than men? >> we do get the vapors. i guess if it is hot. >> basically what she is

saying is as the world's temperature increases so will male superiority. why after working so hard for equality suddenly have, i don't know the hold on all of these resources? that makes no sense to me. and if we get to the point where there will be droughts and no clean water it will be during a time we have developed foods that can sustain that or processed foods that will get us through or a water purification system. she hasn't thought it all through. >> the women by the way will rule if there is a water or food shortage. we carry more fat so y'all are going to be prostituting yourself before yo are with us. >> and our bodies produce success staw nens. >> isn't all sex trans --

transactional? >> i said bring me some meat now. >> you ladies have not traded sex for water but maybe a high end drink like johnny walker blue? >> it is the other way around. >> isn't it good to know the clue i mat change crowd is not engaging in hyperbole and scare tactic? >> it is completely over blown, but if you buy her premise her point is valid. if you don't believe in climate change or that it is a huge danger then fine. >> i believe it. >> if you do it is stupid and end of discussion. if you do believe -- if you are one of the people who believes that climate change is a huge danger to the planet isn't it common sense that the people who feel the effects are people more likely to be on the margins economically which

in a large part of the world it includes women. >> for every woman there is a poor guy behind her. >> if you look at the economic break down the world's richest people are men and down. >> i am not interested in break downs. >> i have seen dumber things which is the best thing i could offer. >> what about joanne's point. in the future when this nonsense is going to happen we will have better food. >> poop water is coming. >> i don't agree with andy as all. you are basing this futuristic wacky scenario on everything else. everything will stay the same but in the future -- the people on the lower runnings of the -- the lower rungs are going to be affected.

it sounds like everyone will be affected. the socio economics will change. it will be like water world or one of those things. >> i think it has been a longtime since you have seen water world. >> i what ouch it all the time. or the one on dry land called the post man. >> what about mad max when mad max -- when mel gibson was hot and we didn't know he is an anti-seem might. >> that was all based on -- oil was the economy. first of all it sounds like a star trek episode i saw. it worked out fine. >> the point is it will not be that bad. if people live near the coast they will just move inland a hundred yards. >> coming up, your nice and thoughtful tweets make me smile. you want to foe what i think about spring break? boy, you are in for a real treat.

start spreading the news. he won't be going home to kenya. yes, president obama is reportedly considering a move to new york city after leaving the white house. buzz feed reports that messy chicago politics and a personal craving for a new beginning could land the first family in the big apple. obama was an under grad at columbia university and the school could end up as the site of his presidential library. in other news, obama also sat down with the creator of the whopper to discuss the drug war and prison problems facing the nation and it marked the first time obama said something everyone can agree on. >> i am a huge fan of "the wire." omar is my favorite character. >> mine too. i also love "the wire." here is one of the scenes from

"the wire." >> oh boy. i didn't know they were going to play that video. >> by the end of season frief. >> i am going to get in trouble for that. >> as well you should. >> comparing a black man to a cat playing the piano. >> you know what that's code for. >> obama meeting with simon to say it is not okay. >> "the view"? i do not agree that omar is the best character on "the wire." >> who is? >> proposition joe followed by stringer bill. >> yes, have mercy. >> omar is a good character.

>> great and a handsome man biggest mistake they made was killing offspringer bill as early as it did. >> can't the president get into a discussion about that. they removed him from tv way too soon. >> are we supposed to think obama is cool? i watched the whole thing. he is cool. i will admit that obama is cool. >> no he's not. >> he seems dc cool. what is he? >> he the president and he has a couple years left and he is taking advantage of that to meet with people he really likes. >> i want everyone to look at that video. he is a smart guy. he is a cool guy. i agree with him about "the view" and they were making great points -- why do i keep calling it" the view"?

they made great points on the war on drugs. he is a thoughtful guy and he has no business being president. >> you are confusing proposition joe with rosie o'donnell. >> you got me. you got me off there. take me, do something. >> maybe owe tbaw -- obama will live in new york and maybe not. i don't air t care. -- i don't care. i don't think obama will like it. usually celebrities come to new york because they don't want to be rec cog nice -- recognized. >> you can pass somebody on the street that you sometimes won't even say anything. >> he loves being rec cog needed . >> cline son is here. do we need more president in the streets of new york with their details following them

around? >> that was my whole point is the fact that nothing is horrible to get from point8 to pointb. i'm sure obama says why does everybody complain about the traffic? i get along fine. zip on through. ridiculous. and meanwhile we are stuck here on the pinnacle of the free world 6789 the presidents come to town. stay out. >> or go to west chester. >> maybe comrade bill would fix the streets if he thought president obama was moving here. >> that's true. he would be there at his beck and call. >> it would take about two weeks before peoe started heckling the president about i broke my leg and it cost me $600. >> if a real president the ex-presidents have to leave town. >> that's a good deal.

>> there are so many secret service. >> obama's take on that when he met with the writers of hogan's heros gitmo. that's his new plan. >> do you know hogan's heros? >> of course. >> is edie mcdonald's conversation and i think it is true. >> the lack of ethics science lab creating lou dabs. get your shillue daabs today. janet? cough if you can hear me. don't even think about it. i took mucinex dm for my phlegmy cough. yeah...but what about mike? (cough!) it works on his cough too. mucinex dm relieves wet and dry coughs for 12 hours. let's end this.

earlier tonight i sat on sean hannity's american power pam of great americans and i discussed this year's spring break epidemic. i said the following -- >> i want to make a serious point. it is political. students are now on their parents' insurance until they are 26. of course they are not ready for college. in 1917 they were. they could go to war and they are ready to get married. they are not ready to do anything. it is ridiculous. that's why i say no college. go to your room. >> wow. wow indeed. it is time for a --

>> of course my point are are the students are so dependent in every sense of the word they are not ready to leave home at all. today's college kids are so coddled and protected they are the equivalent of a 13-year-old from a century ago. why give them freedom of any kind? i would like to do something rare in the world of tv. i would like to change my mind. it i'll rock your world. my premise was correct that young people are like caged birds. it is to get rid of the cage altogether. maybe this spring break idiocy is the parents' fault. it is their fault they are protected from harm, criticism embarrassment and being made to feel uncomfortable in anyway at all that their natural reaction to the slightest bit of freedom is over the top and extreme. these kids are being tested

into oblivion. they spend their childhood with one goal, getting into a good school and being a so-called success. it is no wonder they want to blow off some steam. they have been running on the hamster wheel for 15 years. how about more freedom and not less? how about start young. take off the knee pads and let them skin their knee and stop sharp paw roaning their teen years and let them make the mistakes then. lower drinking age. yes i said it. let them have a glass of wine with dinner and stop acting like it is an elixir of sin sm. maybe they won't fly to florida and drink out of a radiator hose. let them go to college and don't pay for it. they can work and pay for it themselves. essentially tell them to grow up of the either that or you can go to your room.

>> andy? i dare you to find fault with my airtight logic. let them have a glass of wine and act like it is -- don't act like it is a big mystery. they won't want to drive to florida and drink out of the radiator hose. >> they will still want to do that because that is [bleep] rad. >> i never did it because i siped wine at dinner at home with my parents. >> take the sexual assault out of spring break and there is no problem. have fun for a week. >> does his face look like he has ever been in the sun? >> i didn't even go to cape cod. take the sex out of spring break? >> sexual assault. >> as long as everyone is consenting. >> have fun for a week. >> joanne you never engaged in this foolishness, right?

you just -- you jest, you tie one on. when you were a youth you didn't engage in this nonsense, did you? >> i believe there are two types of girls at that age. the ones who warts pate in wet t-shirt contests and ones who don't. i was one of the ones who didn't. i went on spring break but went on a few -- with a few girl friends. we did drink. it was at my one friend's grandmother's house. it is the same thing year in and year out. >> you spring breaked with your grandmother? >> my friend's grandmother. she bought us champagne. it was amazing. >> an adult supervising and siping shall pain and problem -- siping champagne and probably talking about literature. and you didn't feel the need to go out and act like a fool right? >> the real terror we have not talking about is a sunburn. that's the real threat. the

kids are not doing the sun block. >> times have changed. >> do you need help with those out of the way packages. >> do you think hannity is making it tougher for america's young men who want to go down and have a good time? >> i absolutely think so. i woke up and hannity was on and i swear i thought he was selling the "girls gone wild" videos. i had this weird -- is he? this is fantastic. i love it. he is trying to make it look bad, but it is fantastic. >> when it is time to choose a mate you don't choose a babe do you? >> why not? >> it is spring break. it is not like you are courting each other. >> if you want a long-term relationship you don't get silly with these girls right? >> sure he does. >> how smart was my

monologue? i admitted i was wrong when we taped that show and maybe we need to give them more freedom at a younger age. >> you don't get points for changing your mind. i put these leather pants on and they seemed like a good idea. now my belly is hanging over the top. i won't go back for that. >> i feel bad the parents want the wides out of the house. they don't care what they are doing. mom and dad are at home making homemade corn. don't let let the kids there. >> what was that secret ingredient? >> let's keep saying it dicle whiskey and oxycontin.

>> where do you think the kids got it? they steal it from mom and disad. >> did you really change your mind or calibrating your message for different shows? tom you were so quick with the anna grams you failed to point out it was him sell out. cht i feel like that is what is going on here. >> anna grappled my -- >> i i did. >> him sellout? >> i think the fans will be anna gramming your name. >> leave it to the "red eye" fans, # red eye. is it an appeal for young people to break with riew steen? i believe that's an advertising first. they liken mcdonalds to a communist society. >> happiness is eating a sustained breakfast.

>> same breakfast. ♪ io, let's go sphoat. ♪ io, let's go ♪ ♪ io, let's go ♪ >> where are the rest of them? >> they're coming. >> mcdonalds has yet to comment on the communist criticism my feeling is they are not loving it. anthony, i thought the ad was great. the ramones? it is fantastic. >> reminiscent to the apple ad with the ibm being shown. >> of course. i didn't make the connection. >> it is nothing new. it almost made me nostalgic

for communists. remember the good old-fashioned come communism? those crazy clowns. they almost look like they were ready to get down and party. it was kind of cool to see it very well done. >> does taco bell have a point. >> taco bell is making them look cool. then they run to like taco bell and everything is -- everybody will get fat. dark and gray and depressed. >> it didn't look cool. >> brooklyn. >> a proud or something. >> app, what is so good -- the taco bell snap is a different shape. >> i do like the competition.

we need healthy/nonhealthy competition in breakfast. >> is there any competition? i go first place and i will pull in mcdwon naileds, burger -- mcdonalds, burger king? >> i drive around for hours. >> serve breakfast until 11:01. >> isn't that the josh problem? isn't that more communist? >> people who eat mcdonalds would never be able to fit through the hole in the wall. i thought it was great up until that part and thought it is not realistic. >> it is time to take a break. dogs dude and lena done ham. ♪ these are a few of my favorite favorite -- ha, ha ♪ @@@@

in tonight's edition of no way, lina done ham is at the center of a controversy over something she wrote. there was a quiz for "the new yorker" called dog or jewish boyfriend listing 35 things and asking readers to guess which applies to her dog and which to her jewish boyfriend. he does -- doesn't tip.

there is always something new. the director of the anti-defamation league and they will find the stair row types offensive. and a blog wrote all around the world there are people who equate jews and dogs. are you proud to be there? are you, lena? they went on and on. anthony you have never done anything controversial -- >> never. never you a fended. >> it is hard for you to chenet on this story at all. >> if she was going for the joke and some people find it funny, then that's your freedom. she will get criticism obviously , but i don't know it is that kind of humor -- i am not into the ethnic humor. >> you don't like that?

>> believe it or not. >> he has every right to do that. >> i thought it was funny. >> i was just upset she didn't give answers at the bought m to. >> seriously who was it? >> i read the whole thing. i want to hate on lena-dunham. and if anyone should offer an apology it is "the new yorker." this is a great idea. one person did tweet. they made a good point. if jewish boyfriend had been replaced with another race religion gender would they still do it? >> black boyfriend? >> muslim boyfriend. >> trouble. andy you sometimes claim to be jewish. >> if we jews had a serious problem with stereo typing, do you think we would have let it

run? i mean come on. grow up, gois. i wasn't remotely offended. that's the taste, whatever. >> the new yorker 1234. >> i actually thought it made andy barowitz seem funny. how is bananas better than a man and all of those things, they are sexist. it is a staple of jewish comedies. >> until you lighten up. >> come on. dagan shouldn't they lighten up? >> they should lighten up, but she is not funny. she is not funny. an ingrown know nut gets more than dunham. people are throwing themselves on her and she has almost no

talent. and they compare what she did to lenny bruce. that's disgusting. >> coming up watching people watching people eat. boom.

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guests include remi spencer, rob long andrew schulz and on monday, dennis prager. oh i'll miss him. >> e block. last story. that's the last story. >> gluttony. it is an eating show that has made face stuffers semifamous. one woman seen here sits down to eat every night a meal that could feed six. the on-line audio offers feedback encouraging loud slurping asking questions like how spicy are the noodles or can you move the dumplings closer to the camera? fans reward her with cash prizes and she says money is better than what she makes at her regular job. a lot of of viewers are women specifically those on a diet. wait a minute. you guys have been laughing.

>> because she is slurping. >> i was getting self-conscious. joanne you were doing the laugh you do when i make a mistake. >> it is because she almost choked and i laughed. >> this is so entertaining. you understand why there are so many female viewers? >> i spent a half hour watching these videos. i could not stop. there is one that was really cute. she is amazing eating hot wings. i don't know why i love it so much. >> why can't we have the cuban on here? i saw her video today. >> i don't know. >> that's not very nice. she is fine. >> i think it is very attractive. gosh. >> you are a regular viewer of these. >> oh yes. i find when you eat food like

that two days later you are hungry again. >> it comes right back. guy i was reading about this. i started to think that's weird. i think of our reality show and it is no different or less disgusting than my 600-pound -- >> we do it better. we do a full on live orgy which is a golden corral with the chocolate fountain. you go to any golden corral and that's what it looks like. >> does anybody film themselves and get any hits? >> probably. >> people play video games. people play video games and they . >> help me out. young people love this. >> people start chatting and they are like slurp more. how hot is it? >> apparently.

>@ people love it this. >> a special thanks to dagan mcdowell. that does it for me, tom shillue. guess what.

>>ly leads most famous charge in american history. >> i am on side of pickett's charge. >> hundreds of main that made him immortal. >> a suitcase full of heirlooms left. >> a fast talking conman comes to down. >> he dressed well, he was glib of tongue. >> forcing general's heir into battle over his "strange inheritance." >> what was your reaction? >> i was pisd. >> it donned on me i was ripped off.